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hopefully may mga good insights about this :-) wondering about this also lately though i'm not yet looking for OTL hehe

well sis, sabi nga, if the person truly loves you, even the darkest secret can be told and the other person will still love you. it's just that, it keeps me thinking pa rin :-)

Welcome cjv...

Hello cjv!
Welcome to the Kfam forum.

Only Tell your prospective OTL if and only if he/she ask about your previous relationships and you are ready to share that information with him and you trust him.

If the event still hurts or you don't want to share it with him/her at the moment, you can postpone telling him in the futur but as much as possible, it is better that he/she hears it from you instead of finding out later from others.

Edit: Wrong grammar... Need sleep.. Zzzz.

Last edited by anino (2010-04-17 10:36:40)

anino wrote:

Tell your prospective OTL only if he/she ask about your previous relationships and you are ready to share that information with him and you trust him. If it hurts, you might defer telling him later but as much as possible, it that he/she hears it from yourself instead of finding out later from others.

Agree!

Siguro kailangang sabihin kaagad yung major kahit hindi pa tinatanong... yung tipong make or break issues... like kunwari kung single parent ka... or sa past you had broken engagement/canceled wedding... annulled marriage etc... yung ganun....

Pero yung mga common broken bf-gf relationships applicable yung sinabi ni bro anino. Pero kung lima kunwari naging bf/gf mo... wag sanang sunud sunurin lahat na isang pasada ikukwento mo lahat. As time passes by na lang na mapag-usapan. Same din kung ikaw yung other party. Kung alam mo na nakailang relationships na yung gf/bf mo, hindi rin adviseable na mangulit ka na ikwento nya lahat yun ng one time big time. Kung kaya mong idigest lahat yun agad, ok lang. Pero kung hindi, ikaw rin mahihirapan or baka masasaktan.

tama-tama!
dapat malaman un e, malay mo dun nyo mahalata pareho na hindi pa pala talaga ready ang isa sa inyo sa bagong relasyon. Baka ikaw rin mismo habang nagkkwento ka e maisip mo na hindi ka pa pala naka-move on kasi may hurt ka pang nararamdaman.

Pareho kayong may karapatang malaman. Magtanungan. Maging open. Kung halimbawa ako nagtanong tapos sinagot ako ng katulad ng sinabi ni semaj na he prefers not to talk about it... hehe big deal yon, d pa un ready! Friendly dates lang hanap non.

Nung nanliigaw pa lang sa kin mister ko, napag-usapan n namin un. Ako lang amraming kwento kasi sya wala namang past. Nung kami na, dun nya na pinakwento sa kin lahat in details. Kasi sure na rin sya sa sarili nya na my past wouldn't matter a bit. Kinilala nya ko not based on my past, but for what I have been since he met me. Kaya kahit ano pa un nakaraan ko, talagang balewala na sa kanya. And he just loved me more for being honest.

siguro nga pag tinanong na ng guy about sa past relationships then be as honest sa possible as you can. kahit may risk na magalit siya or masaktan siya. kasi kung talaga mahal ka niya lilipas din ung galit or ung pain na na cause ng revelation mo. and maiintindihan ka ng guy kung mahal ka talaga niya

semaj wrote:

as for me, wag muna, baka isipin nya hindi ka pa nakakagetover sa knya...cguro kung kau na at ma-open ung topic, pwede na siguro pero kung nsa stage pa lang kau ng ligawan, maybe you can tell him/her politely na you prefer not talking about it...

eh hindi ba nya mas iisipin na bitter ka pa kase ayaw mong pag-usapan?

JairusJames wrote:

kung ako tatanungin

huwag sasagot hanggat walang tanong..he3

may mga lalakeng gusto malan tungkol sa mga ex niyo meron naman walang paki elam..so hanggat hindi nagtanong si lalake huwag kukuwento ang iyong mga nakaraan ha?

lalo na yung ay yung "ex ko gusto niyan?ay yung ex ko ganito ganyan yung ex ko kasi,..etc etc..ha3"

pero kung ako naman...I'm very open sa nakaraan ko...ayaw kong makilala ako sa pagiging ganito pero hindi naman..gusto ko alam kung sino ba talga ako ngayon dati at bukas...ha3

well, this time, may tanong, sinagot ko lang..kung nagbago isip nya sa sagot ko, eh hindi ko na problema yun...

clai wrote:

JairusJames wrote:

kung ako tatanungin

huwag sasagot hanggat walang tanong..he3

may mga lalakeng gusto malan tungkol sa mga ex niyo meron naman walang paki elam..so hanggat hindi nagtanong si lalake huwag kukuwento ang iyong mga nakaraan ha?

lalo na yung ay yung "ex ko gusto niyan?ay yung ex ko ganito ganyan yung ex ko kasi,..etc etc..ha3"

pero kung ako naman...I'm very open sa nakaraan ko...ayaw kong makilala ako sa pagiging ganito pero hindi naman..gusto ko alam kung sino ba talga ako ngayon dati at bukas...ha3

well, this time, may tanong, sinagot ko lang..kung nagbago isip nya sa sagot ko, eh hindi ko na problema yun...

check! ^^

clai wrote:

Hi, i have thought of a topic which i think is very important to discuss here..Here it goes:

Is it proper for you to tell your prospective OTL about your past relationship (how it goes, and what went wrong)...
Is it okay to open these things up or should you wait that he/she ask you about it..

Hope you find this topic interesting..and i hope nobody posted this same topic yet..

Your answers will be helpful for everyone who is puzzled and for me as well..heheh thanks guys..
have a blessed weekend..

Sa akin, i am an open book. I never regret anything about my past relationships.
Its ok if siya nag ask or dahil related sa topic namin eh napag-usapan.

nova wrote:

clai wrote:

JairusJames wrote:

kung ako tatanungin

huwag sasagot hanggat walang tanong..he3

may mga lalakeng gusto malan tungkol sa mga ex niyo meron naman walang paki elam..so hanggat hindi nagtanong si lalake huwag kukuwento ang iyong mga nakaraan ha?

lalo na yung ay yung "ex ko gusto niyan?ay yung ex ko ganito ganyan yung ex ko kasi,..etc etc..ha3"

pero kung ako naman...I'm very open sa nakaraan ko...ayaw kong makilala ako sa pagiging ganito pero hindi naman..gusto ko alam kung sino ba talga ako ngayon dati at bukas...ha3

well, this time, may tanong, sinagot ko lang..kung nagbago isip nya sa sagot ko, eh hindi ko na problema yun...

korek!

Wag nating problemahin ang mga lalaki, sila ang mamroblema sa atin!

hehehe tama..